some days…

lately there have been days where i desperately have been craving my life, the way it use to be…

…Sunday dinners after church at my mom’s house…
…sitting on the porch with mom and dad watching my babies play…
…joe and i discussing our future, babies names and growing old together…
…long shopping days in Altoona with my mom…
…camp days when the ENTIRE family came…

even as I’m typing this my eyes are welling up with tears. my life is changing slowly, day by day, and I’ve just now realized how much it has changed.

my parents are ageing, my children are ageing and so are my husband and myself. as much as i wish i could stop time, i know this is how the Lord planned “life” to be. we all grow older…routines change…people change…it’s life. why is that so hard for me to accept?

the unknown future weighs heavily on my mind some days, even though I know it shouldn’t. in those moments I pray for the Lord to give me the strength I need, the ability to give all my worries to him and be content with the life I have. I then think of just how lucky I am to have had the privilege to grow older with my parents, husband and children. and just how many people in the world don’t get this opportunity.

as much as i miss the life i had in years past, i would not trade what i have now for the world.  i have two of the best children in the world, i am so proud of them and the young people they are growing into.  joe and i are older but we have such a strong, grounded marriage.  and my parents, bless their hearts, have given me more in the past 34 years than they will ever realize. 
Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

out for now
~kisses