sex was something that just WASN’T spoken about…you were told NOT to do it, but that was all. it was just weird talking to your parents or church leaders about it. most of us went on only knowing half-truths about it…believing old wives tales…believing what our friends told us about it…because really, who could we talk to about it? we certainly would NEVER think of asking our parents…that would just be too weird!
I remember as I went through high school it seemed every year there were more and more teen pregnancies. I believe it was partly because we just didn’t KNOW the truth. and partly because we were searching for social acceptance by our peers. “you are a WHAT? a VIRGIN? what a FREAK!!!!”
so when I had children I vowed to do a few things differently…
• first of all I wanted them to always ALWAYS feel comfortable talking to me about anything at all. I’ve always answered their questions truthfully (and age appropriately) when they asked. we’ve discussed an array of different topics (not going to lie here…some I felt like I needed to take a nerve pill before I answered). each time, I answered the question and didn’t skirt around the subject. and hopefully, for that reason, my children won’t feel it’s weird to talk to me about sex.
• secondly I think it’s very important for us to teach purity and true love waits INSTEAD of just saying “don’t do it”. to explain to them just how beautiful it would be to give that gift to their spouse someday. to explain to them how wonderful it would be to make a commitment to God and themselves to keep themselves pure until they are married. and to humble ourselves and explain that we made mistakes and explain HOW that affected our lives further down the road.
• I also want my kids to know that they CAN make a difference. that they don’t have to be ashamed of their faith and beliefs. I wonder what it would be like if our children could be the ones to flip the switch on peer pressure and use positive peer pressure to encourage their peers to refrain from pre-marital sex.
there are some truly beautiful purity and true love waits jewelry on the internet if you search for it. c28 has some really nice ones!
out for now
~kisses
I hate that I grew up and sex was not spoken of at all, it was all quite a shock when I hit teenage years.
I am not inappropriate with my boys but we are open and age appropriate in speaking about sex.
My 14 yr old even asked me what a BJ was. That is how comfortable he is with asking, I don't think that's a bad thing either!
We have had the "CHOICE" to stay pure talk and what ramifications happen with sex and teenage promiscuity. How it affects a girls self esteem and some girls need to feel loved.
I wonder if I am doing what's right but I guess I will find out when ,my boys have kids! LOL
Such good thoughts here. Thanks for putting them in writing. I know I face similar challenges as my own kids are growing up and facing life in this fallen world in which we live. I know God can use us as parents to help guide them and hopefully support them in every phase of their lives. Best to you as you seek Him and in turn offer your grace to those you love too!