Faith, Love & Truth
When I was a child, there were many days I worked alongside my Dad. I was an only child so when he needed a helper, it was me. He taught me how to put shingles on a house, change my own oil and how to change a flat tire {that was accompanied by a lesson on not ever depending on a man to do these things for me}. He taught me how to drive a 1946 John Deere H, and how to not get the narrow front wheels down in the furrow. He taught me how to sharpen mower blades, how to replace a universal joint on a ’69 Chevy and how to put on a exhaust myself {that was accompanied by a lesson on ability…I woke to the parts and a note on the table “have the exhaust on the car when I get home”}. He taught me how to mix bondo and how to braze. He taught me my hands will always wash off, so don’t be afraid to get them dirty.
During all my days of helping him, there were five little words he would always tell me. Better than I could do. Regardless of the job, how I did it, what my performance or attitude was his answer was always the same…that was better than I could do. It was always accompanied by a pat on the back and a huge smile.
From those words…I’ve always believed I could do anything. I’ve always believed if a guy could do it, I could do it too. I’ve never once doubted my ability to complete any task given me. I’ve never been afraid to jump into a job headfirst, no matter the size. I’ve never felt I had to have a man by my side to start a job, I just go buy the parts and do it. Those words shaped and molded me into the strong, confident woman I am today.
Oh parents, please don’t be afraid to praise your littles. A sweet, gentle and kind spirit from a parent makes such a huge impact in a child’s life. Believe me, it’s not going to spoil them. The purpose of encouragement and praise is to increase positive behavior with the child’s knowledge. Everybody responds well to praise, even adults.
Words of encouragement are so so important to our littles. We see a perfect picture of an encouraging parent in Matthew 3:17, after Jesus is baptized, His Father makes it clear to all of us, just how He feels about His precious son. “And a voice from Heaven said, ‘This is my Son, whom I love, with him I am well pleased.’”
I try to make a point to tell my children how precious they are to me, always. Even if they make mistakes, I encourage them still. No matter how old my children are, from time to time I will just tell them how proud I am of them, how great of a job they did and that I’m so thankful I’m their Mama.
Take a moment today and praise your child. If you see an area where they’re struggling, offer them some life-giving praise. Speak those words out loud, speak them when you’re alone or in front of the rest of the family. Then watch your child grow! Even five little words can change a child’s life.
Oh sweet friend, just writing this post makes my heart feel pangs of sadness. Thinking about you makes tears run down my cheeks. You see, two years ago I was you. I was the girl that couldn’t find her Christmas, no matter where she looked. I was the girl with an empty, aching heart.
Let me share my story.
Two years ago, as the Holidays approached, they felt different. I pushed it aside as much as I could, until the obvious was staring me straight in the face. I put up my tree, made handmade decorations, shopped till I dropped, baked cookies, watched Rudolph, burnt yummy smelling candles…and still nothing. I still couldn’t feel Christmas. Why couldn’t I FEEL it? I ran down the to-be-happy-at-Christmas checklist, put marks in all the boxes and I’m still wasn’t happy.
I was sassy. I was mean. I was sad. I cried. I was distant. I had myself a big ole’ pity party. Daily, I alternated between trying to talk myself out of it and justifying my feelings. Christmas was just so expensive and money was tight. Previously I had a close friend to do fun holiday activities with, this year I didn’t. My dog was aging and couldn’t walk some days. The weather was yucky. There wasn’t any snow. I missed my Grandma who had passed away. My family didn’t get together anymore on Christmas Eve. I could go on and on.
My heart was just sad.
I’m going to be honest. No matter how much I tried to talk myself out of it, it was just a valley I had to walk through. And that’s okay.
Friend, if you’re hurting this holiday season…It’s okay to hurt.
People will, no doubt, tell you to just “get over it” and “move on”. And maybe you feel like you should be over it, but you just don’t know how to be. I want to tell you it’s okay.
If there is anything I’ve learned over the past few years, it’s this. When God leads you through a valley, don’t close your eyes. Keep them open as wide as you can. Along the journey, even in the midst of the valley, there will be beautiful blessings.
I promise you, some day you will find joy in the Holidays again. God has joy planned for you!! At first, it may come in a little smile here or there. Or you find yourself actually singing along to a Christmas carol. Embrace it! Smile. Laugh. Hug. Eat. Fellowship. And when the tears come, embrace them too. Cry if you need to. Be honest and brave.
Healing will come. Laughter will return. Joy will emerge from this dark season. A Holiday season will feel almost normal again.