Forever Beloved

Faith, Love & Truth

mend my broken place ♥

Reckless words pierce like a sword  ~Proverbs 12:18

every day i get up and put on a jumpsuit of “toughness”…

i have to appear tough, i would never in a million years want to appear weak to others…i would never want them to actually know that beneath the jumpsuit i am simply a girl with girlie emotions…a girl who gets her feelings hurt easily…a girl who wants and needs love and acceptance…
words are such weapons…
a bit of speaking before thinking, a touch of gossip, bursting out during stress, a careless statement…do we have any idea what we do to each other with our words?  every word spoken has the power to hurt or heal, and can never be taken back…once the words are shot at us we replay them over and over again in our mind and they have a way of sticking with us…
hurting people hurt people…
their words express how they feel inside – wounded and sometimes mean spirited…even though i know that i still let their words in and they shoot straight through my heart…and then i think about them, over and over again, normally trying to figure out what it was that i did to make them feel like that…i automatically assume the guilt and feel as though it was my fault…
words have broken me, time after time…

i’m going to admit, i’m 35 and i can still replay hurtful words said to me 20 years ago just as easily as ones said to me yesterday…how can i, of all people, heal from that?  how can i ever heal from that?  how can i ever release all the hurtful words i’ve received and held inside like some evil treasure?

so today…
i begin with forgiveness…of the words said to me today and all the words ever said to me…i refuse to carry that burden of others words anymore…i’m tired of them dragging me down and depleting my strength…i want to feel unshackled, released and free! 

♥ love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you ♥

out for now
~kisses

{semi} wordless wednesday

out for now
~kisses

weight loss {february recap}

this month i lost 9 pounds and i am totally STOKED with that!  that is probably the biggest weight loss i’ve had for quite a while. 

i followed weight watchers to a “T” and worked out like crazy and it absolutely paid off.  i am just in love with the weight watchers program and wish i had done that sooner.  honestly, it’s hard for me to eat all my points some days.  i’m slowly figuring out which zero or low point snacks i like.  feels weird to snack after dinner as for the last year i’ve not allowed myself to do that.  but if i still have points left and i’m hungry i allow myself to have a snack and it seems to be working out ok for my weight loss.  there is an amazing white cheddar popcorn i get at walmart (i can’t remember the name of it right now) that is only 3 points for 2.5 cups of it.  totally feels like i’m cheating when i eat it.  and knowing i have that to look forward to later helps me not overeat at dinner. 

as for my exercise, i’m still going to the gym in the mornings.  although some weeks i just didn’t make it every day.  when i go to the gym i mainly do the elliptical and bike.  i super love leaving the gym at 7 am knowing my workout is done for the day!!  and on mondays and wednesdays i am still teaching zumba, which is an amazing burn.  it is number 3 of the top calorie burners.  i have a fitness app on my droid that records your workouts (totally love it) and i can wear it on my arm during workouts.  during zumba it tells me i burn normally between 600 – 700 calories in an hour.  THAT is amazing.  we had a few weeks where we couldn’t have class though because of the building being in use by others.  i imagine if it had been a normal month i might have been a bigger loss.

i am also super excited to say the weight is finally coming off in my stomach.  seems i’ve been waiting forever for it to target that spot.  but the top of my stomach is finally starting to go down.  now if the rest of the little pouch would just go away i’d be happy.  in time i’m sure it will, just have to be patient and keep busting my butt.

so with saying all that, i’m very pleased with this month.  and i am hoping to see the same or better next month.  i’m going to continue exactly what i am doing right now. 

out for now
~kisses